Let's Talk About Sexual Dysfunction - Naked Quickie - Episode 58

In this candid episode of the Married to Naked podcast, we are challenged with questions about erectile dysfunction. We address the reality of erectile dysfunction and break down the fears, and myths in this open discussion on a sensitive topic.

Navigating the turbulent waters of physical challenges in intimate relationships can be daunting. But don't fret, we've got you covered with who to turn to if you need help.

So, tune in for a refreshingly honest conversation and gain a new perspective on how to conquer these often-avoided hurdles.

Here's a link to the website for Dr. Rachael discussed in this episode https://drrachaelinstitute.com/

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Sometimes we only have time for a quickie, so here it is, your naked quickie.

Speaker 2: 0:08

Welcome to the Married to Naked podcast, the Naked Quickie Edition. Hi baby.

Speaker 1: 0:13

Hey baby, how you doing.

Speaker 2: 0:15

Good what you got for me today.

Speaker 1: 0:17

All right, sweetheart. So today we're going to pick your brain on a topic that I know you get a lot of questions about, and this just popped up in a recent conversation where I had said to the person I was talking to that erectile dysfunction is very prominent and man, like 20% of guys, have this, and the person I was saying this to went no way. That's untrue, pulled out my phone and I don't know if I was wrong or if the internet is like completely crazy because there are sites, can you?

Speaker 2: 0:50

just say that again?

Speaker 1: 0:51

No, no, no. The internet, the internet, the internet, no, no, I said that absolutely correctly. Do not think I mistook that there is. If you go online, if you Google how, what percentage of guys out there have erectile dysfunction, you're going to get anywhere. I'm not kidding Between 3% and 76% of guys out there have it, and then all kind or have had it at some point in their life, and all sites are 20%, 50%, 18%, 30%. So it's all over the board. But here's what I'm getting at.

Speaker 2: 1:24

Let me just say I think the right way to say that is will be affected by it at some point in their life.

Speaker 1: 1:32

Yes, so what it got this conversation open up to what happens, or how can you get to a point in a relationship where one person is struggling sexually whether it be erectile dysfunction, whether it be pain from a woman having sex and the other person Are?

Speaker 2: 1:56

you talking physical.

Speaker 1: 1:57

Physical, okay, like physical, something's physically happening. When there's something physically going on, how do you make sex? I don't know how else to put it, but how do you make sex? I mean, do you not get this question all the time?

Speaker 2: 2:13

Oh my gosh the way you just said that. How do you make sex?

Speaker 1: 2:18

I don't know. It sounds very crafty.

Speaker 2: 2:19

How would you have intercourse.

Speaker 1: 2:21

You know what, See? This is why you're the expert and I'm just the goon sitting here next to you.

Speaker 2: 2:26

I love that. I love that. Well, this is a really hard one.

Speaker 1: 2:30

It's a quickie, babe, come on.

Speaker 2: 2:31

It's definitely not a quickie, especially if we're talking about erectile dysfunction, and I can imagine I'm not a man, but I can imagine the idea and fear of that affecting you at some point can have a massive impact on your sense of self. Am I right? And imagining the fear 100%, and you can speak to that whether or not that's been an issue, but I imagine just the thought of it is frightening.

Speaker 1: 3:04

I have never experienced what I would call a rectile dysfunction. I definitely have experienced where I have a hard time keeping it up. So I guess that's the same thing, but it's not because it's a mental thing. I know it is and you basically say we're not in a rush, calm down, and you get me to realize that, okay, this is all in my head. Usually it happens when we're having a quickie.

Speaker 2: 3:29

Ironically, or you feel pressured, or I feel pressured, yeah.

Speaker 1: 3:34

And so that's the only experience that I've had when it comes to this, and you've done a great job of just saying hey, just relax, take your time and then boom, magically it happens.

Speaker 2: 3:43

Yeah.

Speaker 1: 3:44

And I do fear because I've heard that it's later on in life where it could essentially become more prominent.

Speaker 2: 3:53

In my life, viagra is very popular and older men versus younger men, so I could potentially and that does scare the crap out of me- Right, because your identity, and so many men, their identity, is so wrapped up in there being virile and strong and being able to perform, so I can see that that would have a huge impact on anybody mentally. So I feel for anybody struggling, just as I feel for women who are struggling in the ways that we struggle. We could talk on that forever, but the question was then how do you?

Speaker 1: 4:30

make sex.

Speaker 2: 4:31

Make sex. Yes, yes.

Speaker 1: 4:33

How do you do that? I guess maybe I should say can you? And then, if so, how? How, how is it possible?

Speaker 2: 4:41

Well, yes, I mean, I'm not an expert in this field, and if you are looking for an expert in this field, I would suggest looking up Dr Rachel. I think it's just under Dr Rachel. She's somebody that I got my certificate as a sexuality coach from. Her specialty really is in erectile dysfunction, so she has all kinds of tips and tricks and ideas of how to help men suffering from ED, and she is an amazing doctor and she's a fantastic coach and she's somebody that I would look to. Okay, so Joel just looked it up for me. Her handle is Dr Dr Rachel. I can't say enough amazing things about her, and what makes her special is that she's actually a doctor, so her specialty is sex. There's so much to learn from her, and this is her specialty is erectile dysfunction. So I would head on over there.

Speaker 2: 5:51

If you are having any kind of really any kind of challenges, physically or mentally, in the bedroom, she is your go to person. So, of course, there is ways to continue to be intimate. Certainly, you can pleasure your partner, and sometimes that's just as satisfying. But I think what's really important, and before you're going down that road, is to address the issue at hand, and that is what's really going on, because for so many people it is stress that is causing, both for men and women Stress.

Speaker 2: 6:37

Past trauma can have the effects of pain or erectile dysfunction. Those are things that need to be addressed and it's not really going to get better until that can be addressed. So, yeah, can you work around it? Probably, but are you able to fully have fun and enjoy yourself? It's going to be probably rough. Now some people are maybe going to have medical issues where that just isn't going to be an option, and Dr Rachel has toys that she recommends, aids that she recommends that can help significantly in this area. So those are huge options for you, but toys and aids that can't assist us. I'm thinking specifically for men. For women it may be a much more complicated issue, but I feel like for men there are a lot of options, and I mean, sad to say, but that is the world that we have lived in and that erectile dysfunction has been significantly studied and observed, and there's been a lot of money put into it to help men.

Speaker 2: 7:47

That does not go the same way for women. Women with sexual dysfunctions of various kinds have not been studied at length. There are not medications that have had a ton of money put behind them to help women with their challenges that they may have in the bedroom. So men have a lot of options. Women it may be more difficult, but I would certainly reach out to a doctor or somebody like Dr Rachel to get answers on that. So I think that this is a very complicated question. I don't think there is an easy answer.

Speaker 1: 8:25

I will say this I'm going to jump in because this didn't you had no idea what I was going to ask no and I feel like I'm totally rambling and I'm sorry for that.

Speaker 1: 8:33

No, you're not, because I really think you've added value. And I completely forgot about Dr Rachel, and this is going to be a total infomercial for Dr Rachel, because I will say this I remember when you started with her and then you had me, like she had a modules online that you were watching there's some of them that were really, I mean, just incredible to learn from and I remember listening to her and she was talking as if she was baking. So I remember thinking like, oh so, whatever problem or issue or taboo or whatever it is that we think as normal society about sex, she doesn't.

Speaker 2: 9:21

If you are sensitive in any way to like graphic, you know discussions like a true, honest discussions about the body, about the penis, vagina, anything like that. Yes, there is no holds back, she is a doctor, there's nothing to be shy about and she's going to give it to you straight.

Speaker 1: 9:43

It was like she was cooking. It's like oh, you take this, you take that, you blend this, you mix that, don't do this too much of this. And it was literally like oh my gosh, if more people talked like this and had understanding like this, then we would have so many less problems coming forward with a topic like I'm discussing.

Speaker 2: 10:06

True, because so many people are sitting in silence with their issues in the bedroom.

Speaker 1: 10:10

That's what I mean.

Speaker 2: 10:11

They're sitting in silence because they feel ashamed or embarrassed about whatever it is they might be challenged with. And what I think Dr Rachel has taught me is that there is so much available. You just have to be willing to go out of kind of your comfort zone and look for it and be open to trying new things and stepping out of those taboos a little bit. So stepping out of that shame, because Joel just told you what the percentage is. So the truth is you're nowhere near alone. Nowhere near, you just feel like you are because we don't talk about it.

Speaker 2: 10:48

So, you're right. She opens that conversation in a very, very honest way. So if you're struggling in this area, please, you know, I really suggest you start with somebody like Dr Rachel to start getting some answers. Don't sit in silence. There's no reason to suffer. Sex is such a beautiful part of our lives and something we should all be able to benefit and enjoy. Reach out and get some support. I'll put a link to her website so you can go directly to who I'm talking about and it's easy to find. There you go, there's your. It didn't round about answer to question, but hopefully it helps people. Go to a place where they can get help.

Speaker 1: 11:30

Great, job, babe. Seriously, I didn't know where we were going to go with this, but I feel like we're definitely helping.

Speaker 2: 11:38

I hope so. You definitely throw me sometimes and that one I was totally thrown. It's not my expertise, but being on it is still an important issue.

Speaker 1: 11:46

I'm going to check you on that. I know it's not maybe your expertise this particular topic, but you literally went into your expertise to figure out how you can give value to those listening.

Speaker 2: 11:56

You're sweet baby, Thank you. Thank you so much for listening today and we will talk to you next time on the Mary to Naked podcast. Bye, everybody.